- My wife and I are raising both of our children vegan, which goes beyond the food they eat.
- Some vegans oppose zoos and aquariums, but our kids love animals, so we still visit them.
- Eating at birthday parties can be hard — we usually hang by the potato chips.
My 6-year-old son's face erupted into joy when we arrived at his friend's birthday party. He was having a great time with his friends. They bounced in the bounce house and played tag.
Then the parents ushered everyone into the house for food. As they opened trays of burgers, hot dogs, and ribs, my son's face fell, and he turned to me. "Is there anything I can eat? Anything that isn't animals?"
My wife and I have two children, and we're raising both of them as vegans. Parenting is full of challenges, but vegan parenting comes with unique struggles.
The world caters to omnivores. We'd drive from place to place seeing restaurant after restaurant we couldn't eat at. Luckily, things are changing. I was stunned to see Impossible burgers at the airport Burger King and Beyond sausage at the Dunkin'.
It's getting easier, but it wasn't always. Finding vegan options is sometimes like finding a needle in a meaty haystack.
We've been vegan for 8 years
On my first date with my now wife, Rachel, she ordered a salad. I was eating a bacon cheeseburger dripping with grease. I told her she didn't need to watch her weight. She responded that there was nothing else on the menu for her because she was vegan. I had no idea and instantly thought I was doing poorly.
She never minded that I ate meat — but fast-forward to our honeymoon, and I started reading about veganism. On the 12-hour flight, my mind began to change. I learned about the inhumane practices of factory farms, the health benefits of veganism, and the long-term environmental reasons to embrace a vegan life.
For the past eight years we've been vegan together — including through the biggest journey of all, parenthood.
We enrolled our son in a Montessori preschool at 3. It was a wonderful program, and we loved his teachers. We were also instructed that he'd be given cow's milk and Goldfish daily because that was the provided snack. We were allowed to provide our own alternative snacks each week and did. But we were starting to feel like troublesome parents.
Two years later, when he started kindergarten, his teacher criticized the lunches we'd send him in with. It was wrong and prejudiced, but we were afraid of standing out anymore.
It soon became clear we had to pick our battles. We couldn't be nonstop great vegans and great parents.
We acquiesced first on the Goldfish. He was the only kid not eating Goldfish at school snack time, so we let him join in. Then he had cheese pizza at a school party. I didn't want him to be the one kid not eating, the kid everyone laughed at. However, we also emphasized why we don't eat animals and that it's OK for others to do so.
It's not just about food
As he grew, the challenges became more complex. Veganism goes beyond food. Some vegans are against pets, zoos, or aquariums. But our son was obsessed with animals. How could we encourage his passions and teach our values? We go to zoos and aquariums that are accredited or animal sanctuaries and focus on their conservation work.
I once spent two months trying to find a vegan belt. The stores were out, and the online options were frustratingly scarce. It was two months of my son laughing at my falling-down pants.
Back at the friend's party, I was sad to see that they didn't have much for us. Even the pasta salad was full of shrimp. The only vegan food there was potato chips, which we both ate. "I wish they had plant options," my 6-year-old said. "Me too," I replied.
Christopher Mannino is an at-home dad, author, and freelance writer. He writes fantasy books for children and adults and lives in Delaware.
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